Suffering, So Your Friends Don't Have To... (Tales Of The Best Man)

[Savage Haggis]

Long story, short version....

Best Man at Saturday wedding... (Drinking steadily since Tuesday morning...)

Demon Rum... (Nightly to excess...)

Demon shooters...Various... (Nightly to excess...)

Demon Beer... (To take the edge off.... mistake...)

No survivors....

ugh....



From left to right:

"Drunk since Tuesday morning" = Savage Haggis (Best Man)

"Too Nervous to think for himself" = Server Monkey (The Groom)

"Drunk since Tuesday morning, but still remarkably coherent" = Cowboy B (Groomsman)



The Groom (Server Monkey) & the Groomsman (Cowboy B) are both recent converts to Airsoft, after an afternoon in my garage blazing away with my collection(s) -
- so I look forward to helping them spend their hard earned money on guns & gear...

"Server Monkey" married a hell of a great woman & both made out like bandits at their reception. They're off to parts unknown for a little "them" time away from everyone - then, who knows for a few months. Cowboy B & Myself did a bang up job keeping the Groom to be on time, on schedule & on line - & we only had to explain our erratic driving & otherwise socially unacceptable behavior to the local RCMP on three different occasions during the past week. (We were throwing around "Fear & Loathing in Los Vegas" quotes the whole time, which made it all the more hilarious...)

And only after the happy couple drove off into the sunset this afternoon, after the open house & gift opening, did we both simultaneously black out on the side walk... (True story..)

...the Paramedics were very understanding.



Let's hear it for the Happy Couple!!

[Lakonian]

oh my. Drunk since tuesday morning you say? Liver slamming at it's finest.

Congrats to server monkey

[Lerch]

*starts singing* For he was a free fellow, he was a free fellow...

Good job Savage, takes strong kidneys to be pissed for five days

[Naerah]

Originally Posted by Savage Haggis

And only after the happy couple drove off into the sunset this afternoon, after the open house & gift opening, did we both simultaneously black out on the side walk... (True story..)

...the Paramedics were very understanding.

Lol'd a good 2 min on that line!

[Savage Haggis]

...there isn't enough water in all the oceans in all of the world to rehydrate me in any way what so ever...

ugh...

Oh, Jagermeister...
Oh, Captain Morgan (White & Black)...
Oh, Bacardi (White & Black)...
& you other heathen beverages that have left me a shattered husk, a wretching, dry heaving, convulsing shell of a former human being...

What hath thou wrought upon me!?

Why am I plagued by these demons constantly at war within my head!?

Why does my mouth feel as though I have eaten several bowls of finely sifted sand, as well as several pairs of filthy wool socks, & a bag of kitty litter...?

Why does my stomach sound like a pack of wild dogs fighting over the last baby kitten?



But more importantly, when can we go out & do it again!?

Hoo-Wah!

That was a party!

[brently0725]

WHen are you gonna post pics of the secretly hidden camera in their honeymoon suite?

You said you were gonna!!!

[Savage Haggis]

As The Best Man (debatable, I know...), it is my sworn oath to allow the newly weds to enjoy their "Mutual Of Omaha's Wild Kingdom" type honey moon in all due privacy.

...that, & I was threatened with "unga-bunga" if they were, in way what so ever, disturbed over the next several days.

[ChappyAK]

SAVAGE no wonder your hands are always shakin at our sun morning skirmashes... ALCOHAL WITHDRAWL... LOL



you crazy f@$ker.....

[Savage Haggis]

Actually, the usual Sunday morning shakes are the painkillers I'm still on.

But, hopefully, I'll be re-hydrated by this Sunday's game.

...is twenty liters of water a day considered excessive?

[Savage Haggis]

Bwahahahaha!!

Just had this sent to me by a fellow "Survivor".

Consider it a public service announcement...